This is the last entry and you do not want to read it from this point on.

First of all, because of timezone differences, I wrote in mine and published when the time is right on blogs. This way, I actually had more time to think and made some changes if needed. But this last entry is posted right now on the same date as previous entry, because I dont think it matters anymore.

Something happened this morning and triggered the decision to end my journal. Ruined as said, in short its one month and three days ruined, but in fact, its the whole year, and the year just started. I was frustrated and angry, even broke a few things, and had a couple of bruises.

Why I bothered with life, I thought, and since this journal is for that, although I left out a lot of things, ironically, the trigger actually made me to write what I supposed to write about, or at least what I should include, the negativity.

I always a firm believer that we should not allow our unhappy side go out to public, no one else needs to share that, and thats why I tried very hard not to post anything like those, but I did a few times. This one hopefully would be the last.

Really thinking about shutting everything down. Ive canceled all YouTube subscriptions, that I did before. I talked about plants a lot, and Id just leave them, if they dry out, then they dry out. Those seeds, wish they would never come up. Compost, whatever in bin or bag, stay in those, the only things really dont matter if left unattended. The todo notes and ideas I got, all transferring to ToDo Bin. The cat, well, someone would take care of you.

This is my shutdown mode, and same had happened last year. I didnt just left alone, I plucked everything out, including some turmeric rhizomes I happily grew, everything in trash bag, including all the seeds I saved, all dumped. This time, the fate will decide their future.

I wont be bothering with life, but things less complicated on Internet, especially that READYT1k, which I really want to make that happened, I spent quite some time to put together and the result is fabulous, I just need more than 100 videos. I almost thought myself to give up, even shutting down my YouTube channel.

The YouTube channel, the coding, and anything through the keyboard, those are the only things still matter now.

I hope Id meet you again, 34 plus 1, closing.